Blanket statements about childfree women completely ignore the fact that many women with disabilities are routinely legally denied reproductive freedom even when they do want to have their own children.

The Inherent Ableism* in Criticizing Childfree Women

By  Christina Eichelkraut

* Ableism, as the Center for Disability Rights defines it, is a set of beliefs or practices that devalue or discriminate against people with physical, intellectual or psychiatric disabilities.

Any time someone levies a criticism about women who have not had children by birth, large swaths of women are immediately rendered invisible.

There are women who can’t have children for medical or biological reasons. There are women who can not afford to raise a child and are responsibly taking actions to ensure they don’t become accidentally pregnant. There are, of course, women who simply have no interest in raising a child for a whole host of reasons that can range from career focus to personal preference.

It takes only a single tweet or comment from a celebrity, politician or other public figure for all these women, who may number in the hundreds of thousands, to be reduced to one single data point: women who have not given birth. Nothing else about these women — their work, passions, hobbies, the support they give to loved ones in other forms, contributions they make to society through unpaid labor or volunteerism — matters any longer.

Of course, people living with disabilities are accustomed to this dismissal and reductivism. Blanket statements about childfree women completely ignore the fact that many women with disabilities are routinely legally denied reproductive freedom even when they do want to have their own children. Tragically, being childfree can even be a decision that was made for a disabled woman, and was not a choice at all but legal forced sterilization.  

Not to mention a plethora of other obstacles women with disabilities face when choosing whether to have children.

It’s telling that many of the reasons women with disabilities may choose to remain childfree are equally applicable to women who are not disabled. Some women who live with disabilities may want to have children but simply are unable to physically, for reasons that may or may not relate to their disability. Or, a woman with a disability may be unable to afford to care for a child, just as an able woman may not have adequate financial resources. Though it’s certainly worth noting that people with disabilities are among the most economically disadvantaged.

Then there are the barriers unique to women with disabilities. People with disabilities often have to invest an extraordinary amount of their own time, effort and money to navigate an absurdly complex bureaucratic structure to receive and maintain basic social safety net benefits, which add yet another layer of complexity in raising a child.

In addition to the ever escalating cost of having children, there are all the ways the United States disincentivizes having children such as a lack of paid parental leave. This can be a particularly daunting factor to weigh if a woman has a disability that may already require a time off work accommodation. 

Then there’s the pregnancy itself. Simply finding a restaurant with tables high enough to accommodate a wheelchair is difficult enough. If society can’t even remember people with disabilities when it comes to a basic life function like eating or socializing in person, how can the general public be expected to consider people with disabilities when it comes to giving birth?

Several studies indicate that pregnancy is just as ableist as most other facets of modern life. Women with disabilities who do give birth face a number of hurdles other pregnant women do not.

Women with disabilities worry about their doctor’s office being accessible in the first place (imagine going for an ultrasound and not being able to get on the table or through the door to the clinic), their physician being knowledgeable enough about risks that may stem from their disability and having enough support post-birth.

Women with disabilities who do give birth often have their children taken from them for circumstances that would never trigger such a drastic response in an ableist household. Or, they are left to navigate child rearing in an wholly ableist environment.

Which is not say it can’t be done, of course. There are about four million disabled parents in the United States and many of them are successful, kind, loving and caring parents raising amazing kids. And women with disabilities – or anyone with a disability who wishes to become a parent through foster care or adoption – have every right to make that decision for themselves and should be supported in doing so.

Ultimately, a woman’s decision to have a child or not is the nexus of incredibly complex and highly individualized factors. For some women with disabilities, many of the factors specific to living in an ableist world can be deciding factors. Other women with disabilities may simply fall into the camp of not wanting children.

Thoughtless, overly general comments about women who have not given birth carry the insidious assumption that a woman is, by default, able to have a child and will be given access – physically, mentally and emotionally – to all the resources necessary for a successful birth. It is yet another example of ableist arrogance masquerading as social policy and helps no one. Least of all women with disabilities navigating the huge decision of whether to have children. Which is to say these statements harm all women, whether disabled or not.

ABOUT BRAIN INJURY ASSOCIATION OF ARIZONA

The Brain Injury Association of Arizona (BIAAZ) is the only statewide nonprofit organization dedicated to improving the lives of adults and children with all types of brain injuries through prevention, advocacy, awareness and education. BIAAZ also houses the Arizona Brain Health Resource Center, a collection of educational information and neuro-specific resources for brain injury survivors, caregivers, family members and professionals.

What began in 1983 as a grassroots effort has grown into a strong statewide presence, providing valuable life-long resources and community support for individuals with all types of brain trauma at no charge.